Monday, February 27, 2006

Wrap the Flag Around Me, Girls!

My sister, an internationally renowned designer was commissioned to create a new flag for the modern Irish republic. The blankpaige can exclusively reveal (ahead of tonight's launch at Dublin Castle) the final flag design.

The new flag is designed to work at several levels. It meets the design brief of being "eye catching" and "optimistic" and "placing the traditional Ireland in context of new Irish nationalities". Those who are really blinkered can continue to enjoy the tricolour which forms the centre panel of the new flag. Those wishing to take a wider perspective can embrace the new Irish as represented by the yellow and brown panels. Gay & Lesbian groups expressed some concern that they were not adequately represented. However, my sister assures me that pink has been used for stitching (or was it bitching?, I can't remember her exact words) throughout the flag and pink thread is woven into the very fabric. Catholic fundamentalist can also take a narrow perspective that focuses on the Yellow and White papal panels only. Those wishing to "Love Ulster" can focus entirely on the orange panel. Those into symbolism will recognise the delicate white sign of peace at the centre of the flag as well as the black rimmed border with portends trouble ahead. Fittingly there is no place on the flag for any reference to European connection. Late requests to include European Stars and US Dollar symbols were ignored.

Offering the holistic solution and mindful of important corporate branding, my sister suggests that the name "Republic of Ireland" is shortened to "Ire-Land!". There are many reasons for this. (1) The word 'Republic' provokes negative thoughts - e.g. US Republican Senators, Killed by Saddam's Republican Guard, People's Republic of China, etc. (2) It is too long (3) It gets abbreviated to ROI which everyone knows is return on investment (4) It gives the erroneous impression that authority is vested in its people. The word "Ire-Land!" contains three essential elements (a) hint at anger (b) importance of land (3) dynamic energy.

In a show of cronyism, my sister has kindly subcontracted the job of re-writing the Irish Constitution to me and my blogger buddies. Plum contracts are available on submission of a brown envelope.



Blogger JL Pagano said...

"Ire-land"....I like that a lot....

5:28 p.m., February 27, 2006  
Blogger KnackeredKaz said...

Good post...but are you serious? Sorry, maybe I'm being a bit dim but is there a new flag? What? Am I missing something?!

5:46 p.m., February 27, 2006  
Blogger Omaniblog said...

This is brilliant. I hope you are serious. I am. This is the new Ire-land and the new Irish thinking I came home to find.

Inspired by South Africa no doubt.

I'm sorry about the European element but not sorry about the missing Dollars symbol. But then I identify with not having things all my own way.

Top marks - again.

1:25 p.m., February 28, 2006  
Blogger Curly K said...

Very good Paige. You'll have to give us a brief as to the direction the New Constitution will take and I'm sure we'll all come up some suggestions.

A couple of other suggestions on how to view the new flag:

Brown Nosers - aka all politicians, work bullies and assholes in general, can focus purely on the brown section

Cowards - aka Bertie - for not standing up to the USA or UK re Iraqi War, use of Shannon Airport etc. and those terrified of a multicultural Ireland or any other changes to our society, can focus on the yellow section of the flag.

2:35 p.m., February 28, 2006  
Blogger Paige A Harrison said...

As most of you will have gathered, I'm not a finisher. Paul Omani has quite rightly pointed out, I'm one for the bid challenges. Once I can see a solution, I loose interest. Executing the answer is less important, for me, than conceiving it.

Paul + I previously discussed a preamble for our new Constitution.


But I think we should build up to this consititutional challenge by designing the flag, emblem and composing a national anthem. We don't want to get ahead of ourselves!

2:59 p.m., February 28, 2006  
Blogger JL Pagano said...

I would keep the green, white and orange, but I would alter the proportions in such a way that the white part would comprise 80/90% of the flag rather than 33% to represent the amount of people who prefer peace over sectarianism.

That's my serious version - I'm sure I could come up with a load of joke ones as well!

2:34 p.m., March 01, 2006  
Blogger Paige A Harrison said...

I'm with you on that JL but I couldn't convince my idealist sister.

Go on, give us your best funny take on the flag. If it's good enough, I'll change the title to "Wrap the Flag Around Me, Boys & Girls"

2:45 p.m., March 01, 2006  
Blogger plurabella said...

Great idea and I agree with JL.

8:46 p.m., March 01, 2006  

Post a Comment

<< Home